Along with the announcement of Misukuro,
Kawasegawa immediately set up a verification team and began to scrutinize the
app's content.
At the emergency development department
meeting that was held, both Kawasegawa and Kuroda looked lifeless, their eyes
vacant as if they hadn't slept.
"I'll explain the results of the
verification."
Among them, she, who had to explain as the
producer, had a role that was far too cruel, duty or not.
"First, regarding the overall quality,
the report says that the system, graphics, and scenario are all stable at a
high level of quality."
Although Misukuro was released as a social
game, the free-to-play portion was extremely... no, abnormally large. The gacha
was also so generous that it was said to be at a level where it couldn't be
profitable; it was a style that catered to users to an excessive degree.
Therefore, the initial reviews were highly
praised, with nothing to complain about.
"If it's almost free, the rating will
be high on that point alone. Is that what they were aiming for?"
And as for the graphics, they lavishly
appointed as many famous illustrators as one could possibly think of in Japan,
and placed them not in a gacha, but as initial selectable characters. Because
of this, it was easy to introduce on social media, and with the information
released, timelines were instantly flooded with Misukuro.
"So they were poaching illustrators
and graphic artists for high fees to do this."
The information from Miyamoto-san was
correct. But we couldn't see through to its purpose. Thinking back now, the
top-secret project Ryuu-san mentioned must have also been about Misukuro.
The new Misukuro's system was also robust.
They approached the servers with a powerful setup from the start, providing an
easy-to-play experience without any downtime.
However, more shocking than the system or
the visuals was the high quality of the scenario.
The setting and plot that Tsurayuki had
originally left behind were used almost as they were. Moreover, the scenario
written by an external writer based on them was not at a "well done"
level, but was firmly expressed at a level that could be called clearly
interesting.
"I'm beat... there are few boring
points even when playing, and it looks like they had a pretty skilled writer
write this."
In the credits published on the site later,
the writer's name was not disclosed, but the names of famous and popular
writers were being mentioned in the form of "it's probably this
person."
And it was on this very point that there
was an element that would deal a fatal blow to Clodis, which we are currently
working on.
"I have to tell Tsurayuki... something
quite cruel."
Kuroda said, as if squeezing the words out.
The scenario he is currently writing was a
setting and plot arranged based on the original Misukuro. Of course, he has
added some terminology and minor arrangements, but compared to the currently
released Misukuro scenario, it will undoubtedly be similar.
In fact, the team verifying the scenario
had reported finding more than ten event scenarios delivered by Tsurayuki that
had almost the same structure. The conclusion was that if you played both, a
considerable number of users would say they were similar.
"The past history is included too.
They will definitely be compared."
Kuroda nods at Kawasegawa's words.
"Probably. Even the parts we made
thinking they were different will be nitpicked and they'll make a fuss, saying
'It matches!'"
Since they originally stem from a single
project, the one released later is at an overwhelming disadvantage.
"To think they would release it first
for the purpose of revenge... and in secret, no less."
Considering the overall high quality and
speed of development, they must have allocated a considerable budget. Moreover,
the robustness of their information management, which did not allow any
external acquisition by Miyamoto-san or Kojima-san. In every respect, we were
completely outmaneuvered.
(Was this Hachiya's aim, to offer such
favorable conditions...!)
I can't help but clench my fists. Just
being okay with posting the credits was too good to be true. Now, no matter how
high-quality a product we create, we can't escape the slander of plagiarism,
and the "original concept" credit will drag us down.
My intuition at that time, that there was
some kind of trap, was correct after all.
"I'm sorry, it's my mistake... If only
I hadn't said we should use the Misukuro setting back then."
At my words, which I squeezed out, they
both shook their heads.
"It can't be helped, that was
unpredictable. In fact, we agreed to it too."
"Yes, and if we had insisted on an
original setting there, we would surely have been stuck due to the deadline.
It's not nice to say, but we had no escape."
Although they supported me, that doesn't
mean anything will improve. From now on, I have to rack my brains and think of
a solution.
(What am I supposed to do about this?)
The more I sorted out the situation, the
more hopeless the reality was.
"Does the president know about
this?"
When I asked, Kawasegawa gave a small nod.
"When I went to report, she calmly
said, 'I'm aware of everything.' She told me to put together countermeasures,
so for now the project itself is still ongoing, but..."
Everyone let out a deep sigh.
This announcement, coming after we had
already used half a year, half of our scheduled time, was so shocking and had
such a great impact that it was not easy to imagine a countermeasure, even if
you just said the word.
"For now, I'm going to go talk to the
staff."
Kuroda stood up and lightly brushed the
dust off his clothes.
"If we're this beaten up, everyone
else will just be anxious. Whatever the result, let's at least put up a proper
front."
With those words, he left the conference
room.
"...He's amazing."
Kawasegawa murmured, as if it were someone
else's problem.
"There are still things we can do. As
Kuroda says, if we don't move, no one else can do anything, so let's
talk—"
Kawasegawa gently stopped my words with her
hand.
"Kawasegawa?"
"I'm sorry. I know. I know that if I
don't do something, everyone will be in trouble, and I know that it's not all
over yet."
In a quiet, dispassionate voice, she
murmured that much, and then,
"I know, but, I just can't..."
Her voice was trembling. Since she had
promised not to cry anymore, I could see that she was desperately holding back
tears. But she probably wasn't even at the point of wanting to cry anymore. The
despair was too heavy, and her mind and body couldn't keep up.
A sense of responsibility alone is no
longer enough to face it.
"I'll report to Tsurayuki and the
others. You should rest for a bit."
"...I'm sorry."
Her voice was so faint it was as if it
might disappear. It was almost unbelievable that it came from her.
I left the conference room, closed the
door, and in the middle of the empty hallway, I almost screamed for a moment,
but I held it back.
I put my hand on the wall and clenched it.
Crushing the Grape project and freezing
Misukuro were cruel acts, but I could still accept them as company policy.
However, what that company, what the
Managing Director did now, was a complete retaliatory measure that disregarded
all of that. It had completely surpassed the scope of what my mind could
comprehend.
How am I supposed to tell them about this
extraordinary event? Feeling a distance many times greater than usual, I
staggered my way to my desk.
If possible, I wish a big hole would open
up somewhere and I could fall into a bottomless darkness. This was the first
time I had ever felt this way, even among the many hardships I have faced.
◇
I immediately called the three of them:
Shinoaki, N@NA-san, and Tsurayuki. And from my own mouth, I explained what had
happened and talked about the future.
Everyone was shocked, but Shinoaki and
N@NA-san were in agreement that if we could do it without giving up, we should
try again. The fact that their own parts were not so damaged may have had a
positive influence.
However, as for Tsurayuki--of course,
things did not proceed so easily.
"Can we meet and talk for a bit?"
Tsurayuki said so, and I had no reason to
refuse, so I agreed immediately.
Despite the deadline for his new work
looming, he came to BCC's conference room on the same day I contacted him.
He appeared before me, who was already
waiting, a full 15 minutes before our promised time.
"...You've been working hard."
There was nothing else I could say.
His brow was furrowed, his mouth tightly
shut. From that expression alone, it was clear that he was not his usual self.
When I stood up to guide him, he quietly
put down his belongings across from me.
And the first thing he did was put both
hands on the desk.
"I'm sorry, it's because I dragged
things out with the new setting...!"
He said, bowing his head deeply.
"It's not for you to apologize,
Tsurayuki. If I hadn't suggested using the old setting and pushed for it, this
wouldn't have happened."
"No, the reason you had to make that
proposal, Kyouya, was because my work was slow to begin with. It's not your
fault, it's all my fault..."
It was painful. I'd rather he had cursed at
me. But I knew all too well that that would be running away. I thought that
maybe he himself wanted that too.
"Hey, Kyouya... creators can't do
anything in the end, can they?"
Tsurayuki muttered under his breath.
"When you're creating something, you
feel like the creator of the world. You feel the power when what you've made
takes form and has various effects. But when it comes to times like these,
there's really not a single thing we can do. I wonder if from now on, we'll
just be beings who are called 'Sensei' and brought out only when it's
convenient..."
There was the sound of him grinding his
back teeth.
"The company snatches what you've
made, messes it all up, and just when you think Kyouya has found a way out,
they pull a fast one and release it to the world saying 'this is the real one.'
They do some nasty stuff. Compared to that, even demon kings and devils would
probably fight more fairly."
He let out a big sigh, as if to shake
something off.
"My bad. That was a terrible
complaint. It's not like telling you will change anything."
"No, not at all..."
I wanted to tell him not to worry, that
everything would be okay. What I really wanted to be was someone who could give
that kind of reassurance to creators. But now, after giving him extreme anxiety
and distrust, I'm trying to force a realistic judgment on him.
It's not that anyone is to blame. It was
the result of an accumulation of small things, all of which were crushed by the
Managing Director's malice, who sought to overturn them all for the worse.
"Tsurayuki."
It was cruel to say it to him while he was
still crushed, but as long as the project was still ongoing, there were still
things that needed to be said.
"Can you think with me about how we
can start over? If it's too difficult, just considering what we come up with is
enough."
Although the winds have turned against us,
game production as a business is still ongoing.
However, the fact that we have no time left
has not changed. We have to decide what the main writer, Tsurayuki, will do.
For a while, a silence continued between
us. It was clear that an answer would not come immediately.
"--Can you let me think for a little
while? I don't think I can give you an answer yet."
Tsurayuki said so, in a tone as if
confirming each and every word.
"I understand. But I can't give you
much time. I think I'll have to set a deadline. I'll send it by email, so just
look at that. The reply can be in any form."
I wanted to avoid putting a burden on him
as much as possible. Tsurayuki said "I understand" in a quiet voice,
bowed his head to me again, and then left.
"Tsurayuki..."
We had become so close with the writer I
admired that we could talk to each other naturally. Just when we were about to
start creating things, why did it turn out like this?
"What does it mean to create
something?"
I had returned to that very beginning.
◇
I sent an email to Tsurayuki that night. I
tried to be careful in the email, to be as gentle as possible and not overly
considerate, so as not to cause him unnecessary stress.
I set a one-week deadline and decided to
wait for some kind of reply.
"It's a matter of whether we get a
positive reply or not..."
Kuroda was somewhat pessimistic. It was a
very painful situation for Tsurayuki, and even if he were to look forward, it
was clear that he would be at a disadvantage as a creator.
"Remaking the setting and plot,
rewriting the scenario. Even if the work fee for what's already been done is
guaranteed, we'd be doing what should take a year in less than half the time,
huh?"
Reading it aloud again, I realize how
difficult it is.
In the first place, it was Tsurayuki who
had struggled and agonized so much over the initial setting creation. We can't
just casually say, "Let's give it a try," and if even more suffering
awaits him, we can't step into that.
"That's not all. The new scenario will
have an even higher hurdle. Given the good reputation of the comparison target,
Misukuro, they will naturally be expected to surpass it. For Tsurayuki, who has
always created things with the user in mind, that will be tough."
Kuroda was right.
If I were in the same position and asked if
I would take on this challenge, I honestly don't think I could.
To feel motivated to do your best, a
suitable reward and environment are important, but in the current production of
Clodis, I don't think we can guarantee that for the scenario writer.
"I'll wait and see. I'll listen to
what Tsurayuki says then, and then—"
The phone rang. It seems they connected me
via the internal line. When I picked up the receiver,
"Hashiba-san, you have a call on line
3. It's from someone named Fujiwara-san from Gakuoukan Shobou."
"Gakuoukan..."
For a moment, I wondered who it was, but
then it immediately clicked in my head.
It was the editor who had been looking
after Tsurayuki since his debut.
◇
"This is our first time speaking. I'm
Fujiwara from Gakuoukan."
A calm-toned voice came from the other end
of the phone.
He is the person who has worked
hand-in-hand with the light novel author, Kawagoe Kyouichi, to build his
career. While having an eye to calmly assess the market, he was also a person
who had earned immense trust for being able to think of the author's best
interests above all else.
I had previously heard from Tsurayuki
himself that he trusted him as much as, or even more than, his university
classmates.
"This is Hashiba from BCC. I've heard
about you from Kawagoe-sensei."
To get a direct call from such a person. I
didn't think it was going to be good news.
"I apologize for getting right to the
point. Regarding your company's title, 'Clockwork Destiny,' I have heard from
Kawagoe-sensei that you are currently in discussion about whether he, as the
main scenario writer, will continue to participate in the project."
"Yes, that is correct."
It was about that matter, as I thought. I
held my breath and waited for his next words.
However, since he had gone to the trouble
of contacting me like this, it could be surmised that he had some kind of
prospect or plan in mind. It was also conceivable that he wanted to have a
concrete discussion about what to do and when he could start writing.
But.
Such an optimistic prediction was never
going to come true.
"Regarding that matter, Sensei has
explained his intention that continuing is difficult. I am reporting this to
you on his behalf."
"What...!"
"As I thought," I thought, but at
the same time, the feeling of "why?" also welled up.
"Wh-why? And for that matter, why
isn't this contact coming from him directly?"
That's what bothered me. The Tsurayuki I
knew up to now would have definitely reported this kind of thing himself. Even
if he trusts you, this isn't something you have someone else say for you.
Fujiwara-san hesitated, seeming to find it
difficult to speak.
"He said it would be difficult to say
it directly himself. That is why this message is from me. If it is absolutely
necessary, I can prepare a written document as well."
"That's..."
I was shocked. Words failed me.
It's true that the last time I saw
Tsurayuki, he seemed to be in a very mentally unstable state. His strong anger
and grief towards various things in the world. After hearing that, I did think
it would be difficult for him to have a positive reaction...
"From your position as well,
Fujiwara-san, is it your judgment that continuing is difficult?"
To my question, asked just in case,
"Yes. It has been affecting our
publications from a much earlier stage. As for me, rather than saying this
incident is the sole reason, I see it as having crossed the final line."
...So it had come to that. I was at a loss
for words.
Still, Fujiwara-san's words continued.
"From your company's perspective, I
certainly understand that losing the participation of a key writer is a blow.
However, as part of the original contract, there was a condition that he
prioritize writing our publications and that the work not affect that."
It's true, there was such wording. I
remember that when we were at Succeed, it was precisely that which brought us
to the point of ending our contract with Tsurayuki.
That wording was also included in the
contract with BCC this time. Of course, it was included with the reassurance
that something like that would never happen again.
But now, due to that very clause, our
contract with Tsurayuki was about to end.
"As his editor, seeing Sensei's
current situation, I have judged that I can no longer overlook it. I would like
to follow Sensei's wishes."
The words of the editor, Fujiwara-san, were
spoken in a calm tone, but I could feel indignation in every part of them.
That's probably right. A precious author
with whom he had created novels together had been put through a terrible ordeal
many times in a single project and was currently being exhausted. In fact, it
wouldn't be strange to be verbally abused with even stronger words and have
ties severed.
"That is all. Is there anything
else?"
With those words, I realized it was all
over.
"--There is not. I will contact you
again regarding the follow-up. I apologize for the trouble."
I didn't argue, I just said that and hung
up the phone.
"Tsurayuki was no good, huh?"
Kuroda said, perhaps guessing the situation
from my words.
"Yeah, he said he couldn't say it
himself, so he asked him to do it instead. I couldn't believe he was
lying."
"I see."
Kuroda said nothing more.
After the call, I formally decided on
Tsurayuki's withdrawal.
After that, I also spoke with Fujiwara-san
about the matter of the staff credits and the timing of the withdrawal
announcement, but we decided to erase all mention of his name, to announce the
withdrawal only from the manufacturer, and to make the decision not
immediately, but in three months, when the heat will have died down.
Finally, the major premise of the original
plan, to use the three members of the Platinum Generation, had collapsed. I
have to tell Shinoaki and N@NA-san about this. Considering the premise that the
three of them would be participating together, I now have to consider the
possibility that the two of them will withdraw from the project in the future.
It was around that time that I received a
summons from President Ichikawa.
◇
BCC's president's office was a very small
room, only large enough that raising one's voice slightly would be enough to
make it echo.
The three of us—myself, Kawasegawa, and
Kuroda—were sitting on the sofa in front of the president, who looked as she
always did.
The president quickly looked us over and
then spoke.
"We will be discontinuing the
production of the currently in-development 'Clockwork Destiny'."
A jolt of electricity seemed to run between
the three of us.
"That can't be... we in development
are still trying to think of something we can do. Could you possibly wait a
little longer on that decision?"
"It's true that Kawagoe-sensei's
departure was a blow, but we are considering ways to market with the remaining
two as the main focus, or to create a new axis. It's still too soon!"
Kawasegawa, and then Kuroda, pressed on as
if it were their last hope.
However, the president shook her head
firmly.
"Then let me ask you a question in
return: at this stage, can you present a way for this project to recover? Can
you turn everything around and lead us to a solution that is not a
compromise?"
The two who had stood up so vigorously
eventually lost their words and sank powerlessly back into the sofa.
"...No, we can't."
"Yes. It's just, the thought of it
ending like this is so frustrating."
The words of the two were trembling.
After coming this far, even changing
companies for this challenge, to have it crushed by that man's hands again must
have been truly frustrating.
After informing them of Tsurayuki's
withdrawal, it was something I had been prepared for. The brand and marketing
strategy that relied on the three of them together was no longer viable, and
with the upcoming official announcement of Tsurayuki's withdrawal, the image of
the game itself was expected to worsen further.
From President Ichikawa, there was an
extremely logical and coherent explanation, including those reasons.
"I know you all went through a lot to
come here, but I've judged that if things continue as they are, it will affect
the image of Beecraft itself. I hope you can understand."
Being told that much, we had no words to
reply with.
"From now on, the development
department... what will happen to it?"
When Kawasegawa asked,
"Don't worry. Just because Clodis is
over, I won't be firing any of you. For a while, your main work will be
assisting with the development of software being made at the main company, but
once things settle down, we are prepared to have you launch a new
project."
"Understood. Thank you."
For a moment, Kawasegawa's expression
seemed to relax. That makes sense. She also has the responsibility of having
brought over many of the members who were developing Misukuro. As the head of
the department, she would be concerned about whether the staff's employment
would continue.
But that was nothing more than post-defeat
cleanup. It was not about connecting a place to fight, but a passive measure to
think of ways to keep everyone from starving.
"Of course, from the company's
perspective, we must return the favor to Succeed. But it will not be by making
a game."
With that one phrase, I felt like something
inside me had ended.
We get paid by the company to make games.
So, the moment the company tells us we can't make games, everything ends.
So, I should have been able to predict this
would happen. But I never thought it would, so I didn't consider it.
We had nothing more to say. Seeing
Ichikawa-san stand up, we all left together. Even on the way from the room to
the development department, we didn't exchange a single word.
◇
That same day, an announcement was made in
the development department regarding the cancellation of Clodis's production.
Since it was explained that employment
would continue, there was no major confusion, but some staff members demanded
an explanation from Kawasegawa and Kuroda in a strong tone, making me realize
anew that this was not a matter that would be easily settled.
In front of my desk, I was recalling
everything that had happened up to now.
So many things had happened. The story up
until I joined Succeed, the story after being assigned to Department 13, the
launch of Project Grape, and my involvement with Misukuro and the Platinum
Generation.
There were many painful things that made me
think it was all over. But I thought that if it had a happy ending, it would
all be rewarded and become a good memory.
But this was the result. The project I was
trying to create with everyone from the Platinum Generation had truly ended at
this very moment.
"Hashiba-san, I..."
When I turned around, Sakurai-san was
standing there.
"Good work today. I'm sorry it came to
this."
Sakurai-san nodded repeatedly in silence.
Her eyes were bright red; she must have cried a lot.
Even though she only got involved partway
through, she also had strong feelings for Misukuro. And yet, after being
interfered with so many times, this was the reality that awaited her.
"Today is the day of our regular
meeting... what should we do?"
"Right, it was today."
The meeting where the former members of
Department 13 gather to exchange information.
A meeting to check if everyone is doing
well and to discuss if there are any problems in development. But more than
half of the meaning of holding it has been lost.
(Miyamoto-san must be so frustrated...)
The information he obtained had accurately
grasped the Managing Director's scheme in every case. If only we had a little
more material to go on, and the wisdom to infer from it.
But it's no use saying that now. It's not
like a game where you can go back to the past and do it over. All you can do is
optimize what's happening right in front of you for yourself.
Eventually, we'll have to talk about the
future, but for now--.
"Maybe I'll talk to the two of them
after a little more time has passed. I'm sure they can't talk calmly right now,
you know?"
Sakurai-san also nodded.
"Understood. Then I'll contact
everyone and let them know today's meeting is cancelled."
She bowed her head with a "peko"
and returned to her desk.
"Ah, Sakurai-san, and one more
thing."
I stop her as she's about to leave.
"There's something I'd like to ask of
you. Could you make some preparations for me?"
"Y-yes..."
"What could it be?" Sakurai-san
looked puzzled.
◇
After finishing my calls to various places,
I left the company alone.
It was a little later than closing time,
but compared to when we were in the middle of development, it was still an
incredibly early time to be heading home.
I probably wouldn't have been going home
this early for a while. I was about to be struck down by loneliness in an
unexpected place.
I left the building, and my feet stopped as
I was about to head to the station. It's not like I had anything in particular
to do at home. I could go for a drink or something to kill time... As I thought
that, I casually looked around.
"Hey."
I was addressed with a friendly, unclouded
freshness.
It was a voice I recognized. And a voice I
could not forget.
"--It's been a while,
Matsuhira-san."
When I turned around, Managing Director
Matsuhira was standing there.
"Oh, you're not surprised. I was
hoping for something more, like you'd stare wide-eyed, or grab me out of
hatred."
"What business do you have with
me?"
I had no intention of making small talk.
The person in front of me was someone I couldn't hate enough, someone I wanted
to punch just as he himself had suggested.
However, I was interested in him. So, I had
no intention of leaving quickly on my own, and I also wanted to know what he
had come for.
"It's not really 'business.' Is it not
enough of an explanation to say that I just came to see what kind of face you
were making, as a rival?"
I see, well, for him, that seems like a
sufficient reason.
"Why don't we sit there?"
Where I pointed, there was a small rest
area.
A glass roof shaped like an umbrella.
Underneath it, there was a wooden bench and a large stone that served as a
table.
It was a place I didn't usually use, but I
just couldn't imagine taking the Managing Director to an izakaya or a bar.
"What a dreary place. Well, I don't
really care where it is."
Matsuhira chuckled and sat down on the
bench.
I followed his lead and sat down directly
across from him.
As always, his eyes were lifeless and
clouded. He probably intended to smile, but his eyes were always wandering in a
gloomy darkness.
"The fact that you went to the trouble
of sitting down means you want to talk to me?"
"Yes, that's right."
When I answered, Matsuhira chuckled again.
"You're a curious one. After being
hurt so much, you still want to talk."
"I think I'm quite the masochist
myself."
"So? What do you want to ask? To the
question of 'When did you start developing Misukuro?', will the answer 'From
the day after you all left' suffice?"
He had been thinking and acting on this for
that long?
"That was one of the things I wanted
to ask. Just to confirm, you yourself took command of the Misukuro production,
didn't you, Matsuhira-san?"
Matsuhira's expression twitched slightly.
"Oh, how did you know? I didn't put it
in the credits, and I put a gag order on the people making it. I wonder if it
leaked from China."
"I don't have any particular
information. It's my intuition."
"Intuition...?"
Ignoring Matsuhira's suspicious gaze, I
continued my questions.
"One more thing. Did you once work
together with Horii-san?"
Matsuhira showed a faint expression of
anger.
"Did that person blab about such
things to you?"
"No, this is also intuition. No matter
what I asked, Horii-san never spoke a word about you, Matsuhira-san."
Up until today, I had tried to ask
Horii-san questions about Matsuhira many times.
However, he wouldn't say a thing. "If
you really want to know, ask him yourself," he'd say, "but he
probably won't answer."
But with this reaction, I was certain.
"What are you trying to ask me?"
Whether he was irritated, or simply trying
to rush to a conclusion. I couldn't tell, but I knew he had some kind of
interest in this.
Having seen that, I opened my mouth.
"I've been thinking for a long time.
Why you attack us so much."
At first, I thought it was a difference in
company policy.
As a managing director, he would want to
dye the company in his own colors, and he was indeed said to be the next
president. So, he thought of tearing us apart, who had proposed a project that
went against his will, and making us work in different departments.
And, regarding the freezing of Misukuro's
development, I thought it was also due to a difference in policy.
So, although it was a rough method, I
thought that if we changed companies altogether, this time he would lose
interest. That if we just went to a rival company, a place out of his reach, he
would naturally drift away.
However, as a result, he showed an abnormal
obsession, going so far as to do things that were clearly disadvantageous to
the company, just to interfere with our production and stand in our way.
"And that's when I understood. You
probably don't hate us. It's what we're involved in that you have a strong
hatred for."
Matsuhira's expression twitched. It seems I
was right.
"That's why I confirmed it earlier.
Why you, who said game creation was pointless, took command of a game
production yourself. Normally, you'd leave it to your subordinates, right? The
reason you didn't is because there was a reason."
Matsuhira's face stiffened. As I thought,
there must be something here he doesn't want dug up.
"To crush Clodis, it was necessary to
make Misukuro a good game. But to do that, you couldn't leave it to the
development team after all the competent staff had gone. That's why you, who
knew everything about games and hated them to the core, had to take
command."
I was certain. This was the answer
Matsuhira had.
"Matsuhira-san, you... once loved
games. But."
"Yes, yes, that's enough talk."
Matsuhira clapped his hands and interrupted
me.
"You seem to be good at observing and
analyzing various things, but I'm truly impressed that you also have the
makings of a detective."
I didn't respond to the sarcasm, I just
nodded.
"So that was it, after all."
I had been thinking for a long time.
It's often said, but the opposite of hate
is not love. If anything, love and hate are quite close to each other.
There must be a reason for that level of
obsession and action. After the project was completely over, I have been
chasing that mystery.
"Matsuhira-san, won't you tell me? The
reason you changed so much."
Matsuhira remains silent. Only his eyes are
watching me.
"I may not be strong enough, but I can
listen. Won't you tell me the reason you couldn't tell anyone?"
I stood up from my chair. I looked him
straight in the eye.
"Matsuhira-sa—"
"--Sorry, but no."
He quietly crossed his arms and looked
straight at me.
Very ironically, his eyes, which had seemed
so gloomy and clouded until then, seemed to hold a light just for this moment.
However, the words spoken with those eyes
were ones that rejected understanding.
"As if I would tell you. Did you
really think I would blabber on to someone like you, who I just happened to get
acquainted with at the company, about what I've been through to get here, what
I've been thinking all alone? I'd rather die. I would never reveal my heart to
someone like you, who clings to games that I hate enough to spit on. Don't get
carried away."
It was a break delivered in a quiet tone,
dispassionately and without inflection.
"I live to crush everything related to
games, and for that purpose, I'll even dabble in the games I despise. I don't
care about the means. If I can disparage games by making a good one, then that
is the optimal solution."
In his quiet words, I still felt his deep,
helpless anger.
"Get out of my sight and disappear. I
never wanted to meet someone like you."
Matsuhira said, and quietly closed his
mouth.
If I, too, despaired of games to the very
end, would I become like him? I can't even imagine.
But, the person in front of me is me, who
took a different path.
That much, I understand.
"I was saved by the thing you
hate."
I wore down my life at an exploitative
company, wore down my spirit in days of part-time jobs, and wore down my dreams
at the bishoujo game company I had finally managed to cling to.
In those helpless days, my salvation was
the works created by the Platinum Generation.
I received life from the girl and the sky
drawn by Akishima Shino.
I received a heart from the cheerful songs
sung by N@NA.
I received a dream from the sincere stories
written by Kawagoe Kyouichi.
And then, with that power, I came to make
games. I was given a life.
I glared at him. For a moment, he seemed to
flinch.
"So, no matter what you do, no matter
how much you hate and interfere,"
I absolutely had to throw these words at
him.
To this person who tries to take everything
away.
"I will not give up on making
games."
Silence. Matsuhira didn't try to say
anything, just stared at me intently.
"You won't give up, you say? Even
now?"
Chuckling deep in his throat, Matsuhira
continued.
"So, what are you going to do? Even
though you've already lost? Unable to predict what I would do, unable to make
any move, you helplessly ruined your project and your friends. On top of that,
what can you possibly do now?"
From his perspective, he probably thinks
he's taken everything from me.
He succeeded in making me lose the backing
of a large company, exhausting and forcing out the creators I admired,
manipulating even public opinion, and crushing the project I had somehow
managed to hold together.
But I still say it.
"Isn't it obvious?"
I no longer need to face him.
I turned my back and, as I started walking,
I said,
"I'll make another one. Over and over
again. I love it more than you hate it. Everything related to games, to
creation."
I thought I heard a faint click of his
tongue. I ignored it and kept walking.
"To not give up even after all that,
I'll praise that guts of yours, at least."
"Well thank you very much for
that."
"But you are a hopeless fool. If only
you hadn't been so engrossed in things like games, I could have given you much
better treatment."
I laughed at his parting shot.
◇
With nowhere to go, I walked.
It was a time when I could have gone back
to the office if I wanted to, but I didn't feel like it.
I finally spoke with Managing Director
Matsuhira. It wasn't one-sided like before; I was finally able to talk to his
true self.
But, as he said, it was all too late.
The project I cherished was canceled. The
company continues, but neither Kawasegawa nor Kuroda likely have the will to go
on.
I'm the same. It was all well and good to
talk tough to Matsuhira, but when it came to the question of what I would do, I
couldn't give a concrete answer. My feeling of not giving up was genuine, but I
had no means of realizing it.
Like routine work, I got on the usual train
and got off at Shinjuku. Just as I was about to transfer to the Odakyu line, my
attention suddenly turned elsewhere.
"Maybe I'll take a little
detour."
The city of Shinjuku is both a business
district and an entertainment district. In such a city, you can find almost all
kinds of entertainment, and the otaku-related shops are also quite substantial.
I went out the west exit and headed to a
branch of a shop whose main store is in Akihabara. Amidst the glittering rows
of merchandise, I walked around aimlessly.
(I thought there might be something, but...
I guess not.)
When creating becomes painful, it's good to
engage with wonderful works. I always used that as my own personal
prescription. So on this day, too, I stopped by, thinking there might be
something if I went to the shop.
However, so far, there was nothing that fit
that purpose. The surroundings seemed to be a dull color. Even though I had
finally come to the bright, admired industry. I wandered around the store like
a monk on a journey searching for sutras.
When I went to the area where the
bookshelves were lined up, I noticed a familiar art style arranged there.
"Ah, right... it's been
released."
A single book was displayed prominently, as
if occupying all the corners of the bookshelf.
Akishima Shino's new art book.
I had heard that the release was slightly
delayed, but it seemed it had finally been released.
The book had a clear file, a shop bonus,
attached so that it covered the cover. It's a common practice, but I was
somehow curious about the cover and was looking for one without the bonus.
On the way, I realized.
(Come to think of it, that cover...)
The illustration she asked for my opinion
on while she was making the roughs. The memory of not being able to give a good
answer and regretting that I shouldn't have said anything unnecessary.
Those things suddenly came back to me.
"Maybe I should just... not
look."
Just as I was about to gently put back the
art book I had taken out,
"Ah!"
My hand slipped, and I placed it down with
the cover facing up.
I couldn't help but see it, and I witnessed
it firsthand.
For a moment, I thought a wind had blown
and the sunlight had shone there.
Vivid colors. That touch, those lines that
had encouraged and inspired me so many times, entered my eyes, gently
unraveling yet powerful.
I couldn't help but pick it up again. I
held it firmly with both hands and burned the cover into my eyes.
"--This is..."
It was a spring scene.
A beautiful sky was drawn. A girl was
smiling there.
But that picture was not the familiar rough
sketch.
"The background is... gone."
The sky that was drawn was faded to white
with a gradient from the middle, and it was composed so that the illustration
of the girl would stand out.
That advice I gave. I don't know if it was
utilized or not.
But certainly, what I said back then was
clearly reflected in this cover. I thought it was meaningless advice, but it
was properly alive here.
"You... listened to me."
In that short time, and with someone like
me. I was deeply grateful to her for taking those words and incorporating them
into her own expression.
As I stared at the cover in a daze, moved,
a notification sound suddenly went off.
When I hurriedly took out my smartphone, it
was from the social media app.
(Huh, I wonder who it is.)
So that I could react easily when something
happened, I had set it up to receive notifications whenever there was a tweet
from the accounts of the three Platinum members.
However, they rarely tweeted, and
especially recently, with the Clodis matter, no one had tweeted anything.
I looked, and Shinoaki had tweeted. It
seemed to be an image.
(I wonder if it was an announcement for the
art book.)
If that were the case, it would make sense
for her to tweet after a long time.
After a moment, the image opened. At the
same time, the attached hashtag was also displayed.
"Huh..."
It was an original illustration, unrelated
to the art book.
The background was a clear blue sky. In it
was the back of a man.
Where is he looking, at the sky or at his
destination? From that pose alone, it's impossible to tell.
But the message was clear.
#DoYourBest
That word, and the man's hairstyle.
I crouched down on the spot and stared at
the illustration again.
This is me.
These words are for me.
It was simple and didn't have a name
written on it, so it wasn't confirmed. But I understood that it was a cheer
from Shinoaki.
"It wasn't... for nothing."
In this world, perhaps there is no such
thing as waste.
Everything has meaning and is connected.
Words, actions, everything.
I picked up the art book, and also several
other manga, light novels, and games. I gathered whatever caught my eye and
paid for them.
Right now, I just wanted to immerse myself
in the wonder of creation.
◇
"...Ah."
When I woke up, it was already noon. Around
my bed, the books I bought yesterday were piled up like a mountain, all with
marks of being opened.
"That was interesting... everyone is
amazing."
In each and every one of these books, there
is the drama of the creator, and there is drama in what was created. Just
thinking about it made me incredibly excited.
"Oops, my phone."
When I fumbled around my pillow and
checked, as expected, there were several messages. After all, it was the first
time I had been late without permission, and the first time I had woken up at
noon.
"Kawasegawa, and Kawasegawa, and
Sakurai-san, and also, Takenaka-san... right."
Today was the usual streaming day.
But we only had one thing left to stream
about.
"............"
I thought for a moment. About what I could
do precisely because it's today.
After nothing was left, what is it that I
will do?
"I see, that's what it is."
For now, I called Takenaka-san.
"Ah, Hashiba-san!! I wanted to contact
you, but, where are you now?"
"At home. I was sleeping."
"Home!? No way, were you always such a
wild person, Hashiba-san! It's the middle of a weekday right now, isn't it
working hours! You're coming in like a top executive!"
I couldn't help but feel happy at her
reply, which gave back ten for every one I said.
(If the world-line were different, maybe I
could have done more interesting things with this person.)
Putting aside my fantasies, after clearing
my throat, I said what I had decided to say.
"Takenaka-san."
"Y-yes!"
"Today is the stream, right?"
"Ah, yes! I heard about what happened
with development. You're going to announce that, right...?"
As expected, she sounded disheartened.
"Yeah, but there's something even more
important to talk about. So, please set aside about 1.5 times the usual amount
of time."
"What? W-what's happening?"
"It's a secret. See you then."
I hung up and watched. As expected,
messages and stickers were spammed one after another, and her log instantly
became lively.
"Alright then, one more call to
make."
I pressed the group for just Department 13,
looked for the squirrel illustration, and called it.
"Ah, Hashiba-san! Where are you?
Everyone's been worried and calling you."
"Sakurai-san, the preparations I asked
you to make the other day, are they ready yet?"
On the other side of the phone, I could
almost see her confusion.
"Ah, y-yes, they're ready,
but..."
"Okay, please have them ready. I'm
coming to the office now."
"Uh, um, wait, Hashiba-saan!!"
I hung up the phone and started to get
changed.
"Everyone, thank you so much."
I am truly grateful from the bottom of my
heart that everyone worried about someone like me.
"Well then, shall I go to my final
duty?"
◇
As soon as I arrived at the office, I went
to report to Kawasegawa.
She looked at me with worried eyes.
"Thank goodness... you came. I was
thinking you might not come to the office anymore."
"You said 'you'... surely not."
Kawasegawa nodded.
"Kuroda... wants to take a leave of
absence for a while. When I came to the office today, only his application
papers were there."
"...I see."
Even when the president called us in to
talk, Kuroda seemed quite distressed. He himself may have many things he just
can't swallow.
If you say that, the same goes for
Kawasegawa. She went so far as to change companies to make games, only to be
hit with another unbelievable mess.
"Kawasegawa, are you... okay?"
When I asked, she smiled sadly.
"When I quit my previous company, I
think I got too used to despair and things like that. Even after going through
such a terrible ordeal, I can't even cry. Instead, my mind is more focused on
whether everyone will be able to keep working from now on."
I stood up from my chair and looked out
over the entire floor.
Today, too, many people are working in the
development department. The game's development itself has been cancelled, but
everyone has to make a living.
"I might be starting to not understand
what it means to create things. Since university, that's all I've thought about
and lived for, but the harder I worked, the more I had to think about things
outside of the actual production site."
Kawasegawa swore not to cry. That's why, on
the day of the Misukuro announcement, she didn't cry anymore. But that might
not be because she became stronger, but because her perspective on things had
changed.
(It's completely different from before.)
When Misukuro's development was frozen, I
was just thinking straight ahead about ways to create.
But now it's different. I, Kawasegawa,
Kuroda, and everyone else had started thinking from the stage of what to do
from now on.
We are at a crossroads again. In the end,
after a battle with no victors, we have to drag our battered bodies and decide
where to go.
"Today's the stream day, isn't it?
What will you do? You can take the day off, but..."
I shook my head.
"No, I'll do it. There's something I
have to say."
I paused there for a moment.
"The cancellation announcement. I'm
thinking of saying it on today's stream."
When I said that, Kawasegawa closed her
mouth as if startled.
"Are you planning to say it
alone?"
"Yeah, it'll be easier to understand
if I say it. And also..."
"And also?"
Kawasegawa had a look on her face that
said, "What more could there be?"
"Because there's a need for me to say
it alone, too."
◇
Before starting preparations for the Nico
Nama, I headed to social media for the first time in a while.
It was to make an announcement about
today's stream from the official account, which hadn't been touched since the
commotion of that day.
As soon as I tweeted, it was flooded with
reactions. Many of them were teasing or inflammatory remarks related to the
release of Misukuro, as well as expressions of anxiety.
"When you work in the internet
business, you sometimes feel like despairing."
While preparing for the stream,
Takenaka-san began to speak quietly.
"News that's interesting, fun, or
celebratory spreads in a flash, but it doesn't really grow beyond that. The
news that grows is about people's or companies' misfortunes or bad luck, things
you can watch from a safe distance."
She sighed and gave a wry smile.
"But we're just as guilty, since we do
it thinking that's what gets views. The comments section will probably be rough
today, too. Honestly... I don't want you to have to go out into a place like
that, Hashiba-san."
"Takenaka-san."
"Are you really planning to go out
there by yourself? If you need me, please call me anytime. I'll come out right
away."
Takenaka-san looked like she was about to
cry. For someone so lively, it made me very sad.
"Thank you. But it's okay. Please
don't worry."
From the start, I knew that today's stream
would not be a peaceful one. But it was precisely because it was that kind of
place that I wanted to properly convey it by myself.
"We're ready on our end. We can start
anytime."
"...Understood! We're okay over here
too, we'll start at 8 p.m. as scheduled!"
Along with Takenaka-san's energetic voice,
the "preparing to stream" image was displayed. Comments flowed, and
the waiting viewers began to stir. The viewer count started to spin up rapidly.
And then, it was time.
"It is 8 p.m. It's time for the
regular BCC Channel stream. Today is different from our usual streams, as I,
Hashiba, will be hosting by myself."
Immediately, a storm of comments erupted.
Takenaka-san was, of course, popular on
this stream. So most of the voices were lamenting her absence, but some had
sensed the ominous atmosphere and were beginning to suspect that there would be
some kind of announcement.
"I have something important to talk
about today."
Instantly, even more comments than before
flooded the screen.
Most of them were saying "Development
cancelled after all," or "The team is disbanding."
As if weaving through those comments, I
waited for the peak to subside a little.
"Regarding 'Clockwork Destiny,' we
have decided to cancel its development at this time. To everyone who was
looking forward to it, I offer my deepest apologies."
I took a deep breath, said it. And then, I
bowed my head.
The screen was a scene of pandemonium. I
imagine the social media timelines are probably in a terrible state as well.
The comments I occasionally see from users
who must be truly disappointed bring tears to my eyes. No, even among those who
write inflammatory comments on the surface, there are countless cases where
they are actually disappointed.
The reality of development cancellation is
incredibly heavy. Because all the time related to the game comes to a stop
right there.
The scenario, the graphics, the music,
everything that was prepared will, with few exceptions, never see the light of
day again.
As I chewed on that fact once more, I
relayed the official information.
"...That is all. We will also be
posting an explanation of this matter on our official website shortly, so
please refer to that as well."
The official part of the talk was over. I
took a breath and looked around the studio.
Since today was a special day, several
members of the development department, starting with Kawasegawa, were in a
place off-camera. Perhaps even those who weren't here were watching on their
own PCs or smartphones.
After being silent for a while, I slowly
opened my mouth.
"What I'm about to say from here on is
no longer the company's official story. It's my--personal story. Only those who
are willing to listen, please listen."
I was recalling various things.
There is nothing sadder than to say that
one's own life is boring. But looking back, my life up to now has been more
boring than not.
"This is going to sound like I'm
talking about myself, but since I was a child, I was a person with no
distinguishing features."
School grades, sports, and even play were
all average. If I had to say something, it was that I was often made the
organizer, taking advantage of my flat personality.
In the life of Hashiba Kyouya, there were
no waves.
But I didn't think that was strange.
Because it was average. I thought that if I was average, I could live on as
average.
"Around the time I graduated from high
school, I felt a doubt for the first time in my life. I wondered if it was okay
to stay this way. If it was okay to live a life where nothing moves."
I tried to think about what I wanted to do.
There was only one special thing.
Games, anime, light novels, manga. My
admiration and goodwill towards the entertainment industry. A world I could say
I loved from the front, never looking at it from an angle.
Only when I was in contact with them was I
special. It was the only way to escape from the uneventful everyday. It was the
very door that invited me to another world.
I longed for it. But when I was small, I
never thought that I might be on the side that creates it.
But maybe. Maybe I could go there too. The
small doubt that welled up deep in my heart gradually made that blurry dream
clearer.
How could I get there? A mere high school
student couldn't possibly work there. If only I could acquire some skills
before that.
"And so, I finally started to think
seriously about choosing a university."
It was a school in the countryside, but
luckily, they had university materials. In addition to general universities, I
decided to consider a university that I had never considered before.
Art university.
A university where you can professionally
study the world I had only touched upon a little in art and music classes.
Reading the pamphlet, my longing for it grew even stronger.
And so I took the entrance exams. For a
general university, and also for an art university.
"The result. I passed. The art
university that I thought was a distant existence."
I could see Kawasegawa, at the edge of my
vision, show a slightly surprised expression. I hadn't told anyone this story,
so it was no wonder she was surprised.
"I was surprised. To think that I, who
am nothing but ordinary, was accepted into a place I thought only chosen people
could go. At that time, for the first time, I thought. Maybe I, too, have some
potential. But--"
The average way of life I had been used to
up until then. I felt an indescribable fear in taking a step forward from
there.
"I didn't go, in the end. I chose a
normal university."
I had a chance to break out, but in the
end, I returned to the ordinary path.
"My university life there was fun, and
I made friends. But, it's precisely because it's now that I think this. A life
spent half-heartedly dragging along a dream... is incredibly painful."
The company I joined just because it was
easy to get into didn't last long, the shop I joined wanting to get a feel for
the industry, and the bishoujo game maker I joined through connections there,
all ended in a half-hearted way.
I thought it was over.
"At such a time, I was lucky enough to
join Succeed."
I joined the company I admired, and this
time I could create to my heart's content. A cruel reality awaited me, who
thought so.
"But it didn't go so well. Here, too,
I was frustrated and on the verge of despairing of game creation itself."
I saw a lot of the dark side that I didn't
want to see. I also experienced things like backroom dealings. This world,
which I had thought of more purely, was, after all, no different from any other
world.
"There were a mountain of things that
made me sick of it. There were times I threw everything away, took time off
from work, and went out to play. But..."
Even so, in the end, I couldn't throw away
games.
Even if the company changed, even if what I
was making changed, I still couldn't give up.
Because I believed in the power they held.
"Even an ordinary person like me, by
creating something and putting it out into the world, can fill an empty space
inside someone, or become a support for something that is about to collapse.
Once I realized that, I no longer thought of quitting, not even for a
moment."
I felt my voice grow a little louder.
"I love making things. No matter what
terrible things happen, I can't stop."
The works that helped me when I was
struggling.
It circulates, connecting one to the next.
If you deny that, what do human beings live on?
If you have food, clothing, and shelter,
you can survive. But you can't live. To live today and tomorrow with vitality,
you have to read, listen to, and confirm the existence of what people have left
behind.
"There is the idea that entertainment
is something that comes in demand last, after everything else has been
fulfilled. I think so too. Things like this are originally unnecessary."
But, in those unnecessary things,
"It is precisely because they are
unnecessary... that I can't stop loving them."
People become engrossed.
"These helpless, unnecessary things
heal and supplement us, who are incomplete. Because I realized that, I fell in
love with making games."
In the distance of my gaze, there is
Kawasegawa. It seemed she wiped the corner of her eye. Right next to me,
Takenaka-san is nodding with a smile.
Joy and sorrow, hatred and anger, ego, and
prayers for world peace—creating things embraces them all.
"But now, I have lost the work I was
creating. However..."
I cut my words there for a moment and
pulled the PC in front of me closer.
When I gave a signal with my eyes to
Takenaka-san, she nodded, put a wipe on the stream screen, and displayed a
small panel right next to me.
"Right now, at our company, we are
moving forward with a plan called Project Grape. Compared to Clodis, the money
involved is less than one-tenth, a small-scale project. But I believe that this
is packed with creative potential."
I display the materials that Sakurai-san
prepared for me on the stream screen.
Backup for creators, effective use of
materials, interaction between creators.
I explained what I had envisioned in
Department 13 back then, as if unraveling it.
"See? It's good, right? We won't be
cancelling this one, so please participate with peace of mind."
The comments section calmed down a little.
Seeing that, I said.
"And... I, too, will be leaving the
company after this stream today."
I could see Kawasegawa open her mouth, as
if to say something. Takenaka-san also looked surprised. Surprised comments
also flowed by.
"Because I've found something I want
to do."
I held up the tattered project proposal. It
was the project that Sakurai-san had shown me.
If I were to do this, I would quit the
company. I decided to get on board with the project she had talked about.
That's why I decided to quit too.
"I'm going to make a game. Nothing is
decided yet, I don't know where or how to make it, and I'm the only staff
member. But."
With a wry smile, I said,
"But it's... incredibly fun. I don't
know when it will be finished, but when it is, I want to be the first to let
you all know. So, please wait. However,"
I put the telop I had prepared on the
stream screen.
"Release date undecided, price
undecided, title undecided, and staff also undecided."
The comments section was filled with
laughter.
That's right, with no plans at all, just
the will to create, I faced today's announcement. Without deciding what to
make, or who the members would be.
It's like that old internet copypasta flyer
for a band: "I'm the Producer, recruiting for all other positions."
There is nothing there but runaway passion.
But that's fine.
I can't stop creating. No matter how much
power tries to pressure me, no matter how much they criticize me with their
ego, whatever they do is useless.
I will never give up on games again.
"That is all I have to say. Thank you
ve—"
As I was about to bow my head, I noticed a
notification on my smartphone. It was a RINE message. I quickly operated it in
my hand so it wouldn't be on screen and checked the content.
Three messages had arrived.
Once again, I felt like crying. But I held
it in.
Instead, I made a final announcement to
everyone.
"Um... regarding the undecided staff,
it seems we've decided on the illustration, scenario, and also the music.
Details will be announced at a later date--"
